Sunday, April 19, 2009

Why Have Kids?

I was forwarded a link to a fascinating blog post titled “Does Having Kids Ruin Your Life?”

It was written by a 31 year-old childless woman writing under the name kryptogal who was admittedly “indifferent” about children.

One of her major issues around having a child is best summed up in the following quote:

Here’s the way I see it: having a child is like having an arranged marriage with a person you won’t meet until your wedding day. And then you can never get divorced. Your spouse could be tall or short, kind or mean, mentally or physically disabled, funny or humorless, ugly or pretty, lazy or energetic, smart or dull – you won’t know until it’s too late. And you will be 100% responsible for your spouse’s emotional, physical, intellectual, and financial well-being for the rest of your life. If your spouse has problems – say, he/she is an alcoholic or autistic – you will be blamed. You will worry about your spouse and feel guilty about your spouse without cease.

Who in their right mind would sign up for a marriage like that? NO ONE!! Yet that’s exactly what you sign up for when you have a child. You don’t know who your child will be until it’s too late. And you can never, ever, ever un-do it.

So why do 9 out of 10 people seem so gung-ho about this?? Can anyone give me some answers?

Many people did respond to her request for answers. Most were parents and their comments make interesting reading, providing a glimpse into how a parent might respond if asked, “Why have kids?”


Anonymous said...

I love this blog! Thanks for all your interesting posts. I absolutely agree with your suggestion that paid family leave be just one of an assortment of options that employees can select from. Brilliant. And thanks for this link to kryptogal--she has come up with a fascinating metaphor for childbearing, which articulates many of my own unexpressed concerns. I am definitely going to go check out the comments.

Christina at Onely

Anonymous said...

I have fur-babies instead!

Lexxx said...

This blog is great. You might be interested in - it's a new project but looks promising

Laura Scott said...

Thanks lexx for the heads up on

the other woman said...

Oh my gosh! I think we are on the same page.